Backer Story

Mon, 11/25/2013 - 23:27 -- BlueWinds

I started writing it a few days ago. Turns out I'm pretty verbose - who knew - and it's going to be more like 6000 words than 3000. I know you're all shocked and dismayed.

It is, you will not be surprised to learn, about Antinua and Hathawa. Taking your girlfriend home for the holidays to meet the parents is always fun. After this, I won't be adding content for the two of them for a while - time to highlight some of the other women, and move Hilde + Alison towards hireable.

Not sure how long yet, since I've neither finished writing it nor started editing - I just know that I breezed past the 3k mark a few minutes ago, and have only just finished the second act.

Second act of four, not three. Discuss.


Terryble on

I'm not entirely convinced that these concepts of writing structure exactly influence world events, let's not pretend that Japan and China's histories are ones of peaceful cooperation, not much could be further from the truth. But leaving aside these questions I think it's an interesting thing to think about, I suppose I have always taken for granted conflict as a neccesary part of a story without stopping to ask why that is; surely conflict is not all we have. I suppose you could make an argument that conflict is the most easily relatable, easily understood motivation. If you take the kishoutenketsu example you neccesarily have to introduce a confusing, unexplained turn in events or piece of information which is later wrapped up to influence the entire story. While this is certainly a valid way of telling a story it isn't as easily understood as "Good guy walks along, good guy gets hit in face, good guy fights back and wins, good guy walks away happy." Does that make Western story telling better? Certainly not, but I'm also not convinced it makes it worse either.

It's probably also worth mentioning that kishoutenketsu story-telling is not neccesarily without conflict, in fact an entire story can be nothing but conflict as long as the overall structure conforms.

What's my point? I'm not sure I have one, I guess this is just a thought.

BlueWinds on

It's more about conflict not being the defining charactaresitic of the story, rather than the exclusion of conflict as an element. Looking back on the stories I tell my friends, I notice that many of them lack a climax:

"I went into the office for a meeting yesterday. Yeah, it was interesting to meet with the marketing team, but I felt like I was getting dumber every time they spoke. Social this, media that, let's give the users 'points', blah blah blah shallow consumerism. Haha, yeah, I guess it takes all sorts. We went out to dinner afterward, just the engineers and I."

I could easily recast that into a conflict-driven plot - "blah blah blah consumerism. It was a huge relief when they left and I just got to talk with the other techies." Instead of a part of the story's flow, it's become a conflict that needed resolution. I defeated stupidity by talking with smart people.

Neither telling is "right," and the difference is one of emphasis rather than content. The first telling feels more natural to me - it's how I actually framed the story when I told it to my friend - but a writers group would tell me that the second is better

Vestrina on

Nice.  I love the relationship between Hathawa and Antinua.  It's both hot and sweet at the same time. ^_^

endings on

And in contrast, I wasn't so pleased with the large amount of scene swipes with these two. For me Hath worked two whole days; then ran off and here was another large string of events of Antinua acting like the heroine, while our actual hero/ine, is mostly a spectator.

I'm hoping the hero eventually could take a more active decision-making role, as opposed to so much  reacting to things happening to them in the game.

BlueWinds on

That's one reason I want to focus on the other women for a while - those two are in a star-crossed world of their own, whereas Hilde and Wend care a lot more about what the PC thinks and says.

endings on

I don't know if this answer has been put out there already, but can a player can pick and choose which ones to hire? As opposed to you need girl B to access all girls above, C, D, E, etc.

BlueWinds on

Mostly you can pick and choose.

Wend is hired automatically, as part of your intro to the game. No choice there.

Hilde (will) take quite some time to hire, but doesn't depend on anyone.

Alison also depends on no one, and (will be) the fastest potential acquisition.

Antinua can't be hired without Hathawa. You could get Hathawa without Antinua, but only if you're willing to continually ignore a starred blue event every evening for the rest of the game.

The sixth (unannounced) woman will require a second hire beyond Wend, but doesn't care who.

endings on

Nice. That sounds totally reasonable.

The_Ripped on

I have seen that style of story telling done before, but mainly in shorter works - it works very well for 4koma style comics and stories. Short stories (2-4 pages) also can make it work. The trick is that you need to keep an eye on minimum time away from each side of the story, so the reader doesn't forget or lose interest in the old side, and keep the twist within certain limits, to prevent moderate or excessive confusion (oddly enough, great confusion often works just as well as mild, depending on the story).

I've also seen nice variations including repeated twists and merges, and ones where the functional twist is in the first. It's not an easy style to work in, but it can be quite fun done well. I've mostly seen this style in comedic or slice of life settings - I'm not sure how it would work with a drama...

Jethro Makari on

While by no means do I consider myself an expert storyteller, or well-versed in the methods others utilize, I'll drop an opinion. The usage of conflict is to draw upon the exciting, right?

From the perspective of competition, like two seperate films, say a man just bought a car. He drives over to his friends' apartments to show off all of the new features and advanced engine. As he gets out and steps onto the sidewalk where his friends are waiting, a loud boom thunders from down the street. Looking at the source of the sound, they can see the junction of two destroyed cars intertwined and shreded in the intersection ahead.

If they could only chose one, which story do you think the group would pursue (at least at first)?

Kishōtenketsu is still a new concept to me, so the analogy could be off.

@The_Ripped: I think fundamentally the genre of drama would contradict the usage of the style.

- I suppose as a final note on my personal perspectives, the article is dealing with a social belief that I'm completely unfamiliar with: That there needs to be a conflict for it to be an interesting story. However, I do believe that if you stick 'high-grade military' at the beginning of anything, there's a 117% output of awesome. Here, try it yourself with words and phrases like:

- Dislocation, Eyelashes, Love affair, Toothpaste, Belief Structure, Apple Fritter, or Tandem Bicycle.

BlueWinds on

High-grade military Parchisi.

High-grade military eggplant.

High-grade military garage door opener.

Genious. If you weren't already a contributor, I'd have marked you as one because I haven't laughed that hard in months.

I told it to my high-grade military roommate, and he did find one counter-example - high-grade military intelligence is only about a 23% awesome increase instead of the full 117%.